We sometimes dare to dream about achieving greatness - being the best at what we do, winning at something, acquiring a new skill. Sometimes such thoughts are triggered by watching someone else perform at a high level. Focusing on the end state however is not how mastery is acquired. Why? Well because by focusing on an outcome, your mind is preoccupied with the gap between where you are and where you want to be. To get really good at anything you have to get absorbed and highly engaged in the process of learning. To do this you need to :
- Cultivate a positive relationship with frustration. Frustration is to learning as sensation is to pleasure. When frustration triggers withdrawal our internal dialogue is often full of judgement "why can't I do this", "this sucks", "I will never be any good at this..". When frustration triggers engagement our internal dialogue reflects persistence "this is really challenging", "I like being stretched", "let me try that again.."
- Seek out and pay attention to feedback. Unfavourable outcomes are the catalyst for learning. The more curious you are about your performance - good or bad, the faster you will learn and develop. I recently worked with a golf pro who would always look away in disgust whenever he hit a 'bad shot'. Accepting 'off target' shots allowed him to be interested in what his body did to generate the result, thus enabling him to significantly increase his performance. No matter what it is that you are working on, feedback is critical to improving performance.
- Play to your strengths. The fastest Bassett Hound is unlikely win a race against the slowest Greyhound. Be selective - cultivate personal and professional interests in things you love doing and have an aptitude for. Your level of engagement will increase, you will improve faster, and you will be more likely to persist with the activity.